I am not your Inspiration

What comes to your mind when you think about people with disabilities? Some admit to not have any thought, some admit to a little heartbreak, but most will proudly say the word, "inspiration!" and that's the problem. "You're such a strong person." "You're such an inspiration." "You're a role model." Oh really? You summed me [...]

3 AM

It's 3 am and you're in my head again. I should be thinking about him, but instead, you - engulfed with guilt of feeling something for someone else. Five minutes have passed and I am now enraged; of how the universe could be so cruel in making us meet then tearing us apart. And at [...]

Stay

I count the calluses on your hands and the dreams in your mind. Kiss your fingertips and trace your freckles with mine. You have constellations on your skin, an evident angel underneath the clothes you wear. The space between us is disappearing. You send butterflies down my spine, counting the speckles of gold in your [...]

To My Future Partner

Dating me will be a little a lot different than all the girlfriends before me. I'll be skeptical at first, because my dating pool consisted of egotistical boys that wanted me on their conquest list, (as if fucking a disabled woman is a high achievement) and the boys who adopted me as their little sister/self-pro claimers [...]

Exposed

Nervous, after all this time I still get nervous around you. Of what to say and how to project it, hoping it doesn't come out foolishly. My mind races; thinking of all the witty things to say to you counting my fingers and toes and double checking my facts. Because the idea of you reacting [...]

The In-between

Maybe she was a lost soul after all- Swaying back and fourth From the sun and the stars, Not wanting day and not wanting night, Not wanting to be here nor there. Stuck in the in-between. The in-between of connection and distance, Of confusion and clarity, Of drought and drowning in emotion. She wanted to [...]

Petit Café

It wasn’t bitterly cold that season – The chrysanthemums were boasting in their bloom, But my fingers fancied holding my sixth cup of mint tea As I was watching people; The children holding hands Near the fountain where a lady holding a book threw a coin into, The birds picking up the crumbs left behind [...]

Relapse

I’m sitting naked on the cool bathroom floor, watching the steam roll off my reddened skin, hoping that the guilt I feel in my stomach goes away and not make me rest my arms on the lavatory seat like the night before. I let myself slip again – I saw it coming; all the sleepless [...]

I Hope You Stop

I hope you stop. I hope you stop carrying the solar system on your shoulders just to give people the love of the moon, sun and stars combined, for the stars you’ve given belong in your eyes. I hope you realize that people are truly are like sunsets, stop chasing them, another will come shortly. [...]

Read this to the Love of your Life

Having A Coke With You - Poem by Frank O'Hara is even more fun than going to San Sebastian, Irún, Hendaye, Biarritz, Bayonne or being sick to my stomach on the Travesera de Gracia in Barcelona partly because in your orange shirt you look like a better happier St. Sebastian partly because of my love [...]

Demons

I made a promise to myself; to try and fix you, to trace your scars with my words, and somehow make you forget the agony. I’d let you share the secrets within the folds of your heart, embrace all that was trapped inside you belligerent to see dawn. Now, well I carry pieces of you. [...]

Aurora Borealis

he was the northern lights, dancing in the night sky, so gently with his colours, breaking the vast darkness with beauty. she was the ice cold water, gazing up at his majestic parade. all she wanted was to be considered, something extraordinary, but she didn’t know that – yes, he was showing off, for he [...]

Open Letter to You, the Anxious Ones

It feels like you're running out of time, or rather the fear of time running out. It wants time itself to stop, not in the example of death, but for it to freeze. So even just for a moment, you had the power to control everything. Anxiety has this deep need of self-centrism; for you [...]

Ambedo

i’d watch him; reading a book concentrating intensely on that one page and repeatedly push his hair back, but failed in trying to get it off his face. the tense look upon his face broken by his smile – oh that smile he possessed. i’d watch him; his fingers dancing across the fretboard of his [...]

Flower Crown

why is it that your hair is permanently tangled, he asked. my thoughts run through each strand never still, every time my thoughts focused on you – a flower would blossom. rapidly my tangled knots had a variety of bouquets, you made me feel free; with all your colours and scents. but I noticed that [...]